Who is the Toddling Mama?
That is a good question. One this mama is still struggling to find out.
Motherhood has always been a bumpy journey for me and seven years on I still feel like I am learning how to walk. By definition, children spend just two years toddling around. For some moms though, it can feel like an eternity of trying to find and maintain their balance and identity. In the past fifteen years I have been married, divorced, and now committed. I’ve been a working mom and a stay at home mom. I’ve been a single mom. I’ve had postpartum depression and postpartum joy. I’ve been hardcore religious and anti-religious. I’ve been anti-feminist and feminist. I’ve been very conservative and liberal. I’ve gone from one extreme to the next always chasing the dangling carrot, the latest movement or ideology that promises solutions to my problems and answer to my questions.
I don’t fit into a neat box. I am not a pretty packaged wrapped in a bow of how a mom or woman should be. Life has a way of doing that to you. Experience is what defines your beliefs and as experiences grow, as you learn, everything changes. You are humbled. I once thought I had all the answers, but then kids happened. Having children rocked my world and challenged my beliefs to the core (and I mean this in a good way). Everything I believed in theory was totally different once put into practice. This has placed me at a bit of a philosophical crossroads the past several years as I re-evaluate who I am and what I believe.
This is not your ordinary mommy blog. If you love the superficial,the pretty, the polished, the delusion that all of life is sunshine and lollipops, this is probably not the blog for you. Rather, if you prefer the real, the raw, the deep, the challenging–if you want connection over inspiration, join me. Because being a mom and woman is so much more than picture perfect images, so much more than what we see. This blog is for the moms and women that toddle. For those who wander with uneven steps, but are not exactly lost.
Join me as I grapple with thoughts on motherhood, relationships, society/culture, history, feminism, and religion. If lucky, you might even find a mommy tip thrown in here and there for the cool factor.